http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/ An overclocking forum devoted to maximizing the performance of graphics cards, CPUs, motherboards, RAM and everything else found inside your computer case. en Wed, 25 Nov 2009 23:20:02 GMT vBulletin 1 http://static.overclock.net/images/oc/misc/rss.jpg http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/ http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/1210-little-johnny-back.html Mon, 29 Jun 2009 13:47:36 GMT a little Johnny joke, an oldy i think but a classic.

A woman brings eight-year-old Little Johnny home and tells his mother that he was caught playing doctors and nurses with Mary, her eight-year-old daughter.

Little Johnny's mother says, "Let's not be too harsh on them.... they are bound to be curious about sex at that age."

"Curious about sex?" replies Mary's mother. "He's taken her appendix out!" ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/1210-little-johnny-back.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/1209-joke-time.html Mon, 29 Jun 2009 13:46:08 GMT its that time, i've got some rippers.

"Have you heard? Theres now a new Viagra, in liquid form. They say its a stiff drink"


I was walking down the road when I saw an Afghan bloke standing on a fifth floor balcony shaking a carpet.

I shouted up to him, "What's up Abdul, won't it start?"


I just saw that Harry Potter film. A bit unrealistic if you ask me. I mean, a ginger kid, with two friends? (no offense to anyone)


Disabled toilets. Ironically, the only toilets big enough to run around in. (again no offense)

will be back with more when i dig them up. im going for the stupidly funny. you know, those jokes that arnt THAT funny but you still laugh coz really they are, they are just lame too. ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/1209-joke-time.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/1167-weekly-jokes.html Mon, 08 Jun 2009 07:24:44 GMT due to popular demand (not really but i always wanted to say that) i have some jokes to start the week. they are lame but made me laugh pretty hard just coz they are lame. you may have heard them before but here we go: Why did the Italian man go to the hospital? Coz he was fully sick. ... due to popular demand (not really but i always wanted to say that) i have some jokes to start the week. they are lame but made me laugh pretty hard just coz they are lame. you may have heard them before but here we go:

Why did the Italian man go to the hospital?

Coz he was fully sick.

:lachen:

Have you heard? Theres a new viagra nasal spray available. They say its for d***heads.

:lachen:

Please dont remove my blog post on that, its a joke.


thats all i got for now, im at work and i think they monitor this stuff? haha. ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/1167-weekly-jokes.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/1127-thats-what-she-said.html Fri, 15 May 2009 09:10:07 GMT readers and posters beware, im on an official TWSS (thats what she said) mission, to get in 50 of these "more annoying than anything comments" in the many threads and posts on OCN.

why? im that bored. :cool:

:wave2: ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/1127-thats-what-she-said.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/685-internet-forums-downhill-spiral.html Wed, 08 Oct 2008 03:09:47 GMT im not much of a internet surfer, dont really cruise around sites and jump in on the forums or anything. except for here, theres only a few i occasionally visit. so what are some peoples problems these days? its embarassing to read some posts that a lot of idiots..well, post. not sucking... im not much of a internet surfer, dont really cruise around sites and jump in on the forums or anything.

except for here, theres only a few i occasionally visit.

so what are some peoples problems these days? its embarassing to read some posts that a lot of idiots..well, post.

not sucking up to anyone, but OCN has in my opinion the best community and forum management that i've come across, hence why i frequent this site.

but other sites, Gamespot for example, and even Playstation AU/NZ, they are ridiculous.

full of gimps with nothing better to do than browse the site, jump in a thread and pretty much tear down anybodys opinions provided they disagree.

in the famous words of my dead hero

"have we deteriorated to the level of dumb beasts?"

how does everyone else feel on this subject. come across the same things i have? its embarassing to admit im a part of these communities sometimes when you read peoples posts and i think "dude, you actually THINK like that? you're a ****" ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/685-internet-forums-downhill-spiral.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/625-plan-your-friday-laugh.html Fri, 15 Aug 2008 00:54:11 GMT If this doesn't make you smile...go outside and fine a sense of humour lol

:cheers:

The Plan

In the beginning was the Plan.

And then came the Assumptions.

And the Assumptions were without form.

And darkness was upon the face of the Workers.

And they spoke among themselves, saying, "It is a crock of ****, and it stinketh."

And the workers went unto their Supervisors and said, "It is a pail of dung, and none may abide the odour thereof."

And the Supervisors went unto their Managers, saying, "It is a container of excrement, and it is very strong, such that none may abide by it."

And the Managers went unto their Directors, saying, "It is a vessel of fertiliser, and none may abide its strength."

And the Directors spoke amongst themselves, saying one to another, "It contains that which aids plant growth, and it is very strong."

And the Directors then went onto the Vice Presidents, saying unto them, "It promotes growth and is very powerful."

And the Vice Presidents went unto the President, saying unto him, "This new plan will actively promote the growth and vigour of the company; with powerful effects."

And the President looked upon the Plan, and saw that it was good.

And the Plan became Policy.

This is How **** Happens. ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/625-plan-your-friday-laugh.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/607-bumper-sticker-year.html Fri, 01 Aug 2008 02:39:23 GMT am i the only one that blogs jokes?

:D

As the title implies, Bumper Sticker of the Year:

"If you can read this, thank a teacher. And since its in English, thank a soldier" ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/607-bumper-sticker-year.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/603-joke-week.html Fri, 25 Jul 2008 23:40:18 GMT What's the best way to jump to a conclusion?

...

Leap off a tall building. ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/603-joke-week.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/600-metal-gear-solid-craze.html Wed, 23 Jul 2008 08:15:01 GMT im in. totally. haha. i have only just completed MGS1, and im now up to the plant chapter of MGS2. the tanker chapter was really short and kinda easy...compared to the first game. im only playing on Normal though. im hooked on this game like crazy, cant believe i never played them before... im in. totally.

haha.

i have only just completed MGS1, and im now up to the plant chapter of MGS2. the tanker chapter was really short and kinda easy...compared to the first game. im only playing on Normal though.

im hooked on this game like crazy, cant believe i never played them before now. i have MGS4 still in its factory sealed wrapper just waiting to be played, but im not touching it until i get the other ones finished.

MGS3 i started, but im not the biggest fan. i think maybe coz i tried it before any of the others and i wasnt used to the gameplay. may try it again later.

Hideo Kojima is one intelligent mofo...he's also about as wacky as Lewis Carrol when he wrote Alice in Wonderland. some of the storyline, well most of it, along with the characters, are just crazy haha. makes you love it more though right?

i kinda hope they DONT make a movie out of this game...theres no way they could pull it off and honour the legacy that MGS has created. theres just too much involved to cover even part of it. each game would need its own 3 hour movie at least lol. maybe if they made a cartoon-animated movie on it, so they can better represent the scale of the story. for some reason, i dont think the casual viewer would buy into a real life picture of one man taking on a 45-foot nuclear walking tank with a shoulder-operated stinger missile system. ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/600-metal-gear-solid-craze.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/594-friend-foe.html Fri, 18 Jul 2008 18:13:17 GMT can i just ask, what do you do?

your "mate" gets out of line at the pub. to the point where he starts on a chick. im serious.

then he gets in your face...

do you a) smash him.

b) just let him blow off steam, potentially injuring you, but in the long run feeling guilty?

where do you guys draw the line with backing up a mate in need.

in this case, my mate started on me in the end, and i almost had to floor him..but then he passed out. ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/594-friend-foe.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/589-great-aussie-sporting-comments.html Wed, 16 Jul 2008 03:51:03 GMT You guys might not recognise the names of these greats, but the comments are hilarious..

(1)Ron Barassi talking about Gary Cowton
"I told him, 'Son, what is it with you. Is it ignorance or apathy?' He said, "Barass, I don't know and I don't care."

(2)"Luke Hodge - the 21 year old, who turned 22 a few weeks ago"
(Dermott Brereton).

(3)"You guys line up alphabetically by height." and "You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle."
(Barry Hall Sydney Captain at training).

(4)"I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes."
(Peter Bell - Fremantle - on his University Law studies).

(5)"We actually got the winning goal three minutes from the end but then they scored."
(Ben Cousins, West Coast Eagles).

(6)"I never comment on umpires and I'm not going to break the habit of a lifetime for that prat." (Terry Wallace).

(7)Garry Lyon: "Have you ever thought of writing your autobiography?"
David Swartz: "On what?"

(8)"Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw."
(Dermott Brereton).

:thumb:

Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oi Oi Oi! ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/589-great-aussie-sporting-comments.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/579-r-i-p-my-mate-glenn.html Thu, 03 Jul 2008 11:58:00 GMT R.I.P mate. Glenn Barnett Born: October 24, 1986 Died: July 2, 2008 Image: http://img375.imageshack.us/img375/743/glennpj7.jpg Article on accident (http://www.news.com.au/perthnow/story/0,21598,23956565-2761,00.html) R.I.P mate.

Glenn Barnett
Born: October 24, 1986
Died: July 2, 2008



Article on accident

Glenn mate, you were always a crazy out of control b*stard. but you had a heart of gold.

Glenn would do anything for ya. loved his family, his friends, all his mates.

My sincere condolences to his family and his friends. Glenn made a mark on everyone's life that he came into contact with, its such a tragic loss of life.

Mate, you will always be remembered. Like the time I got alcohol poisoning off Tequila at your 17th party, and nearly had to call an ambulance, but you called my old man instead..i still don't drink Tequila haha. its funny how stories like that, while kind of disgusting to most, stick with you and help you remember all the good times we shared.

Forever in our hearts man, take it easy upstairs, watch over us ay. if they let me, i'll play for you at your funeral...

:cheers:

PS. sorry i couldnt find a better photo of ya..you make terrible photo's though haha. :thumb: RIP. ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/579-r-i-p-my-mate-glenn.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/498-atreyu-avenged-sevenfold-bullet-my-valentine.html Mon, 12 May 2008 23:10:21 GMT what an effing night. Perth Western Australia was graced with the presence of these artists last night Monday 12 May. im still half tanked at work (4 hours sleep), my throat is killing me, i have no voice and my neck hurts like hell. doin well though :drunken: hats off to the yanks (and... what an effing night. Perth Western Australia was graced with the presence of these artists last night Monday 12 May.

im still half tanked at work (4 hours sleep), my throat is killing me, i have no voice and my neck hurts like hell. doin well though

:drunken:

hats off to the yanks (and the Brits ;)), you blokes spit out some huge talent. ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/498-atreyu-avenged-sevenfold-bullet-my-valentine.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/382-joke-week.html Fri, 14 Mar 2008 04:48:54 GMT "What is a man's ultimate embarrassment?"


Running into a wall with an erection and breaking his nose.

:D ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/382-joke-week.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/356-beer-contains-female-hormones.html Fri, 07 Mar 2008 06:24:54 GMT Beer contains female hormones :drink: :drunken: Last month, National University of Lesotho scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. The theory is that beer... Beer contains female hormones

:drink: :drunken:

Last month, National University of Lesotho scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer.

Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption.

The theory is that beer contains female hormones (hops contain phytoestrogens) and that by drinking enough beer, men turn into women .

To test the theory, 100 men drank 8 pints of beer each within a 1 hour period.

It was then observed that 100% of the test subjects :

1) Argued over nothing.

2) Refused to apologize when obviously wrong.

3) Gained weight.

4) Talked excessively without making sense.

5) Became overly emotional.

6) Couldn't drive.

7) Failed to think rationally.

8) Had to sit down while urinating.



No further testing was considered necessary.

:D
:cheers: ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/356-beer-contains-female-hormones.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/237-joke-week.html Fri, 25 Jan 2008 05:24:24 GMT 'Hello, is this the police?

'Yes it is. How can we help you?'

'I'm calling to report my neighbour, Wazza.
He's hiding cocaine inside his firewood!'

'Thank you very much for the call.'

The next day, police officers descend on
Wazza's house in great numbers. They search the house and then go out to the shed
where the firewood is kept.
Using axes, they bust open every piece of firewood but they find no cocaine.
They swear at Wazza and leave.

The phone rings at Wazza's house.

Hey, Wazz, did the cops come?'

'Yeah!'

'Did they chop up your firewood for ya?'

'Yep.'

Happy Birthday, maaaaaaaaaate!!!.

:thumb: ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/237-joke-week.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/205-public-toilets-dreaded-floater.html Mon, 10 Dec 2007 03:19:53 GMT OK guys, this one completely eludes me. I go into the toilet near my office at work (its not a public toilet as such, however the public can use it, a lot of building workers like sparkys etc use it) and at least once a month or so, in the cubicle i walk in and there, staring me ripe in the... OK guys, this one completely eludes me.

I go into the toilet near my office at work (its not a public toilet as such, however the public can use it, a lot of building workers like sparkys etc use it) and at least once a month or so, in the cubicle i walk in and there, staring me ripe in the face, is a massive log.

What i dont get is...the log just sits there, on its own in a seedy pool of filth. there is no used paper in sight. so what the hell are these people doing?

theres a few scenarios that come to mind. some filthy tradesman has come in to do a **** and and gone, hey, thats pretty impressive, i bet the whole world would appreciate that. so they then walk bent-over so as not to smear into the next cubicle to wipe, leaving their prize to be glorified by all.

highly unlikely, i know. but you never know do you.

another more likely scenario is the famous Phantom ****e. the one where it comes out so fast and smooth, it barely touches the edges and upon wiping, there is no mess at all. again feeling proud, the doner pulls up his dacks, carries the single used piece of paper into the next cubicle or to the bin, disposes of it and leaves.

but i mean seriously man. have you EVER walked into a dunny, seen a floater waiting there and gone "hey, not bad mate. bloke must have good genes to drop logs like that". NO! haha who gives a **** what your **** looks like. how hard is it to flush?

also as another funny point, you notice how everytime you come across a floater, instead of flushing you move to the next cubicle instead? haha " **** that, not my job to flush someones **** "

Aussie Aussie Aussie :thumb: ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/205-public-toilets-dreaded-floater.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/61-bioshock-tips-tricks-guide.html Wed, 05 Sep 2007 08:07:46 GMT Over in the PC Games forum I posted my small guide to Bioshock, just offering some tips and tricks from my own experience to help those in Combat and general survival during the game. No story spoilers are included or solutions to specific puzzles, it's just a basic guide, and my first, so be gentle :p ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/61-bioshock-tips-tricks-guide.html http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/57-tale-four-friends.html Wed, 05 Sep 2007 02:44:54 GMT Four Friends

Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party. After several drinks, one the men had to use the rest room. Those who remained talked about their kids.

The 1st guy said : "My son is my pride and joy. He started working at a successful company at the bottom of the barrel. He studied Economics and Business Administration and soon began to climb the corporate ladder. He is now the president of the company. He became so rich that he gave his best friend a top of the line Mercedes for his birthday."

The 2nd guy said : "Darn, that's terrific!&n! bsp; My son is also my pride and joy. He started working for a big airline, then went to flight school to become a pilot. Eventually he became a partner in the company, where he owns the majority of it's assets. He is so rich that he gave his best friend a brand new jet for his brithday."

The 3rd man said : " Well, that's terrific! My son studied in the best universities and became an engineer. Then he started his won construction company and is now a multimillionaire. He also gave away something very nice and expensive to his best friends for his birthday - a 30,000 square foot mansion."

The 3 friends congratulated each other just as the 4th returned from the restroom and asked : "What are all the congratulations for?"

One of the 3 said : "We were just talking about the pride we feel for the successes of our sons. ..... What about your son?"

The 4th man replied : "Oh, my son is gay and makes a living dancing as a stripper at a nightclub."

The 3 friends said : "What a shame ..... what a disappointment."

The 4th man replied : "No! I am not ashamed. He's my son and I love him. He hasn't done too bad either. His birthday was 2 weeks ago and he received a beautiful 30,000 square foot mansion, a brand new jet and a top of the line Mercedes from his 3 boyfriends." ]]> gtarmanrob http://www.overclock.net/blogs/gtarmanrob/57-tale-four-friends.html