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Old 10-30-07   #31 (permalink)
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1) Prepare turkey using RAM to poke the stuffing inside said turkey
2) Proceed to plug in and install software for George Foreman's USB iGrill, as shown in this picture:

3) Once turkey is prepared, decorate the turkey with small holes using the pins of a S478 CPU, preferably a crappy old Pentium 4 for extra tang.
4) Season with crystallized thermal paste and some salt if you wish
5) Launch iGrill application on your computer and set to maximum heat
6) Observe as your USB port begins to fry from the power draw, but the iGrill warms up to temperatures exceeding 300C
7) Place turkey carefully on iGrill and wait 5 minutes.
8) Turn turkey over and grill the other side for 5 minutes.
9) Place grilled turkey in fan-assisted oven for 45 minutes until piping hot
10) Make sure turkey is sufficiently cooled before consumption using your choice of 120mm fans
11) Devour turkey.
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Old 10-30-07   #32 (permalink)
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Hmz. cooking a Turkey Dutchie style

1:Take a harddrive and club the turkey on the head till the annoying gobbling stops.
2:Hook up a unshielded 120 mm fan to a psu and remove all feathers with it.
3:Now we have a sollid base to start some gourmet cooking.
4:Soak the turkey for at least 24 hours in a mixture of sambal,garlic,soy sauce and a dash of MX 1.
5:Time to do some serious cooking, Turkeys taste horrible when eaten raw so we need some heat.
6:Attach some non brand memorysticks to a external psu. Slowely increase voltage till you reach 100 degrees celcius.
7:Insert ram sticks in the bird, closely watching temperatures (we don't want the turkey to dry out now do we?)
8:After a sollid 20 hour simmering, check the turkey to see if it's done. Increase the voltage if neccessary to make sure the bird isn't undercooked.
9:If you grave that golden brown crust that comes with your thanx giving turkey, roast it for, let's say 2 hours under a Ati 1950XT. No need to stress the card because it will be hot enough whilst idlling.
10:And Presto! There's your turkey all nice and crisp, ENJOY!
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Old 10-30-07   #33 (permalink)
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man, i could really use some ram, these ddr333=ddr400 dont like me lol.

hmm, reserving post for my idea later . ill even do pics lol
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Old 10-30-07   #34 (permalink)
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How to use a slowly aging PC for cooking turkey!

1) Take your soon to be rubbish PC in to the kitchen
2) Remove all the hardware from the case apart from the PSU
3) Take as much Geil Ram as you can find and glue it all to the sides of the case to make it 'water proof'.
4) Test to see if the ram is working, it wont as its geil! LOL
5) Apply more glue and anything else you can find including giblets!
6)When finally water proof, place the whole Turkey in the case (case on its side btw)
7) Fill to the top with salted water
8) Plug the IEC in the PSU and then in to a wall socket running 3 phase (400 odd volts)
9) Turn on the socket at the wall
10) Finally drop a small piece of Potassium in to the water from a LARGE distance.

RESULT= WELL cooked turkey. It will taste like crap but it was fun cooking it!!
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Old 10-30-07   #35 (permalink)
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O'man this is easy!!

Stuffing:
Bread crumbs, eggs, water, salt, pepper, onions. Mix together and place into the Turkey.

Computer.
1) Disconnect all watercooling tubing.

2) Make holes in the turkey.

3) Route the watercooling tubes through the turkey and reconnect all the tubing.

4) Refill the watercooling loops.

5) Overclock the computer to the max with *HIGHEST POSSIBLE VOLTAGE* and let the turkey act like a huge radiator and let slow cook for 15 hrs.

6) Put new Crucial Ballistix in to my computer and eat the slow cooked turkey.

7) Next day eat a Turkey sandwich wile overclocking my new ram.
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Old 10-30-07   #36 (permalink)
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I cook my Thanksgiving turkey using an old family recipe passed down from the mists of time. Actually it's more like whatever I happen to have lurking in the kitchen at the time.

Stuffing

4 boxes of Jiffy Bake cornbread
2-3 eggs
2 cups of celery (chopped)
1 cup of diced onions
~1 cup of Swanson chicken broth
salt/pepper/sage to taste

I crumble the cornbread into a big bowl and combine all the ingredients till it makes a thick paste-like substance. Then it goes into the bird...

The Turkey

1 turkey...the biggest I can find within a 100 mile radius
butter
salt/pepper
more chicken broth

Wash the turkey. Pat dry. Rub butter over the outside. Sprinkle on salt and pepper. Stuff it with the dressing...usually about 3 minutes into this step I realize I forgot to take out the organ bag so I have to do that and then re-stuff the thing. Place the whole mess in a turkey roaster and pour in about 1/2 to 3/4 inch of chicken broth. Cook according to instructions on price tag.

When the turkey is done (skin between legs and body split without my help, wings begin to fall off), I take it out of the roaster and put it in a big roasting pan and place in an oven set to broil. This scorches the skin a bit and gets rid of the pasty white appearance.

You may be thinking I've forgotten the computer...you're wrong! By the time I decide the turkey is done, I have usually burnt it to a black cinder, so I have to go hunting on line for someone willing to sell me a pre-cooked turkey and allow me to pick it up locally. Usually by this point everyone is tired of the whole Thanksgiving thing, so we just go to a fast food joint instead.
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Old 10-31-07   #37 (permalink)
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Lol I have an idea how about we find a way to cook the turkey on the computer components. It may not be edible but hey it's cooked!
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Old 10-31-07   #38 (permalink)
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Default Over(cooked)clocked Turkey

Step 1 "Get the Turkey"

I'm just going to use an example weight, but say we goto a Wal Mart Supercenter and pick out a small 5lbs turkey (guess we're so geeky we eat alone on thanksgiving).

Step 2 "Prepare the platter"

Doing a bit of research with our computer & google.com, we find out that the metaling temperature of aluminum is a mere 600C.

So the aluminum side panel of our Lian Li PC-V2000 case should be just great :]

Step 3 Find Cooking Time

Little computer use and a little google-ing and we have a calculator for turkey cooking time and temperature!

Seems our 5lbs Turkey will take about 1.5-2 hours @ 325F (or 162C for you metric nerds).

Step 4 Cook the Turkey

Put it on the platter and place it in the oven for the required time.

Step 5 Eat with "Sauce"

Now that it's time to dig in, we'll need something tasty to pour over our thanksgiving meal. . . how about some Fluid XP Ultra non-conductive liquid coolant?! I mean, it's UV reative, FDA approved for human consumption, and you (still) won't feel sparks fly when around women duh to it's non-conductive nature


**Disclaimer** - I really suck at cooking :[

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Last edited by trendy : 10-31-07 at 08:15 AM Reason: and i suck at counting . .. 4. . . 6?! wow. . .
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Old 10-31-07   #39 (permalink)
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What are the hottest components known to this forum? I've got an idea for an entry but i want the hottest components.
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Old 10-31-07   #40 (permalink)
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Lol. Brilliant.

Quote:
Originally Posted by trendy View Post
Step 1 "Get the Turkey"

I'm just going to use an example weight, but say we goto a Wal Mart Supercenter and pick out a small 5lbs turkey (guess we're so geeky we eat alone on thanksgiving).

Step 2 "Prepare the platter"

Doing a bit of research with our computer & google.com, we find out that the metaling temperature of aluminum is a mere 600C.

So the aluminum side panel of our Lian Li PC-V2000 case should be just great :]

Step 3 Find Cooking Time

Little computer use and a little google-ing and we have a calculator for turkey cooking time and temperature!

Seems our 5lbs Turkey will take about 1.5-2 hours @ 325F (or 162C for you metric nerds).

Step 4 Cook the Turkey

Put it on the platter and place it in the oven for the required time.

Step 5 Eat with "Sauce"

Now that it's time to dig in, we'll need something tasty to pour over our thanksgiving meal. . . how about some Fluid XP Ultra non-conductive liquid coolant?! I mean, it's UV reative, FDA approved for human consumption, and you (still) won't feel sparks fly when around women duh to it's non-conductive nature


**Disclaimer** - I really suck at cooking :[
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