Originally Posted by Heret|c
Can someone explain me: what's so cool about zombies?
To me, zombie modes are a culmination of a lot of things. Love, hate, and above all, a craving for the endless slaughter. But before we get to that, let me tell you how it all began...
When I was a kid, I didn't have any guns. None. Not even those little cap guns you'd get in a convenience store or a supermarket. Everybody in my neighborhood had at least ONE ridiculously large rifle, one kid even had a freaking Millennium Falcon that shot discs.
I remember asking my mother for a dart gun/foam blaster as a birthday present. She looked at me with such venom, that any desire to own such an item was secreted out of me in liquid form and I felt an intense pain in my chest. Oddly enough, that's when the term "Staring Daggers" got really popular. Not saying I started it or anything, but it was a bit of an odd coincidence
. Anyhow, when my birthday finally rolled around, I got a giant red and bouncy pig. Having been kept back in kindergarten, I wasn't really splitting the atom. I couldn't comprehend the difference between something that is edible and something just LOOKS
edible, so I took a bite.
It tasted foul.
Then I realized you weren't supposed to eat the thing, but throw it against walls. This was unacceptable to me. At age 10, playing with a deformed creature that looked like it came from an acid-laced trip in Willy Wonka's mind was not priority #1. My frustration had gotten to the point where I threw it out the 5th story window of our apartment building.
Mom never found out about that little incident.
So a few months pass and I'm playing with my friend Patrick. He had gotten a bunch of dart guns for Christmas and invited me over to play with them. This was the opportunity of a lifetime, and I wasn't going to let it slip through my fingers. However, I couldn't help but be a little scared going over to his house. To put it lightly, Patrick was a bit of a wacko. He was the only kid I knew that actively ate paste. In Arts and Crafts class, he would use the Popsicle sticks as spoons to shovel the gruel into his mouth. Elmer's, model plane glue, even paper mache. It didn't matter to Pat. I don't see how he enjoyed eating that stuff. Maybe it was just to satisfy some sort of oral fixation. Looking back, it explains quite a bit. Patrick also had these old toys from the 1940's in his room. A lot of them were made of steel and probably stuffed with asbestos. On this particular Saturday, he cracks open his toy chest to show me all the monster action figures he has.
What I saw was not pretty. The majority of these figures looked like they had been through some kind of Haitian Voodoo Rattle Torture. There were cuts all up and down their faces and they smelled like my grandfather's cologne cabinet. But, that's where I discovered my diamond in the rough. It was the first time I ever saw a zombie.
His name tag read "Private Corpse".
He only had one arm, one leg, and had a generous amount of scabs all over his body.
He was beautiful.
It was that moment, I knew I wanted to slaughter zombies. I took Private Corpse to the backyard, as well as a hammer and went to town. I remember hearing screaming, I think it was Patrick yelling to stop breaking his toys. I didn't care, all that mattered was smashing this fool into a thin green paste.
Since then, my bloodlust for these inhuman monsters has not ceased. I've actually grown more and more ravenous to spill their guts and laugh while doing so. Having zombie modes in games enables me a proper outlet for this fetish.
So thank you Treyarch.
Thank you Activision.
And thank you Valve. Edited by frickfrock999 - 4/26/11 at 7:56pm