awesome. this works. its now added to the startup folder, and will hopefully remove this loathsome windows windows behavior from my consciousness forevermore.
what i have tried that -didnt- work - (win7, embedded intel graphics, db15/vga connector) - buying a gender-bender adapter and removing pin 12, as advised by others.
case closed (i hope) and thanks to tapsa for pointing to an option that -did- work. better yet, its in software, and free. )))