So the new board (with its BIOS chip back) went into BIOS fine, and I looked around a bit. When I shut down to add my other 512mb stick of RAM, I couldn't get it to boot again. It won't work in dual channel mode (I forgot to try one in yellow and one in an orange slot). I ran memtest and both passed multiple tests (9 on one and ~20ish on the other) with no errors. I'm not sure what's up with it. Do I have to do something fancy?
I'd give Blitz's suggestion a try. The DFI boards were actually quite picky with certain memory.
After powering on the board what do the 4 LED's look like (located on the bottom of the board)?